Justin Bieber thinks spots are cool

Name: Pimples.

Also known as: Acne.

Appearance: Cool, according to Justin Bieber.

Sorry, are we talking about the Swedish fashion brand Acne Studios? Nope. We’re talking about the skin disease, acne vulgaris.

Oh. Great. I love talking about skin diseases. Come on, it’s just pimples! Even the great Bieber gets pimples, as he proved by pointing to several in an Instagram video labelled “Pimples are in”.

That’s what the kids are reduced to now, is it? Videos of Bieber’s pimples. Oh, I don’t know. The video’s only been watched about 54,000 times.

Still, acne can be very upsetting for people at the time in their lives when they care most about looking good. Maybe it’s comforting to think that Bieber knows how they feel? Ye-es. He seems pretty cheerful about it, to be honest. And I’ve watched closely, but it’s hard to see any actual pimples. Plus, of course, he’s very handsome to start with.

But the point is he shares the pain of ordinary spotty teenagers. To the best of his ability, I guess. And the Beliebers seem as pleased with him as ever: “this world doesn’t deserve you <3” says one comment, from “ik.maha”.

How right ik is. We should send Bieber to Neptune. Good plan. I’ll call Elon Musk.

But look. Enough fooling. Spots aren’t really cool, are they? I’m not sure. The Malaysian designer Moto Guo used models with acne to show off his collection a couple of years ago.

Seriously? Seriously.

I suppose having tons of zits is natural. And it does make you look young. Exactly. Bieber must be regretting his spell as a salesman for the anti-spot treatment Proactiv a few years back.

Boy, is his face red! Or not red. Anyway, you know what I mean. I do.

So how do I “get the look”? There’s very not much you can do, I’m afraid. Whether you get spots seems to be mostly a matter of the genes you inherit from your parents, and how young you are.

But if I’m lucky enough to see a pustule starting, should I stop washing? Maybe start picking at it? Please don’t do those things.

Hey, I have to suffer for my beauty. I wouldn’t bother, if I were you. I don’t think pimples will remain a fashion accessory for long.

Why not? They don’t cost anything. And most young people have them already.

Do say: “Oh, please. Pimples are so over. It’s all about blackheads this spring.”

Don’t say: “I’ve got a wart. Will that do?”